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Thursday, August 31, 2006

Journal Bits

Patrick Phillips is hot. Can I get a witness??
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I love to discover new blogs. Welcome John Gallaher. Yep, that's him in Crazyhorse. Damn! Those bastards have rejected all the poems I've ever sent them. Bastards! It's such a fine journal. I'm not sending to them 24/7! I'm not that kind of poet. Trust me. I'm not a journal stalker. Like...Oh, you know who I'm talking about. Don't be coy! You know. Wink, wink. Well, back to blog plugging. Wow, that sounds nasty. It's been forever since my blog has been...John Gallaher has a blog! Go read it. But beware! He's got a very cute author photo. I love that half-smile on his face. Did he just think of a masterful simile? Or did he just...I don't know. You'll have to ask him. He's got a blog. You can leave comments.

Hey, did you know John is co-editor of The Laurel Review? I didn't know. He has such an informative author bio! The Laurel Review published one of my poems two years ago. I don't like that poem anymore. The poem was a rip-off of Rita Dove's "Geometry." I love that poem. Don't you? Such wonderment. But I'm glad my poem was published. It allowed me to "see" it with fresh eyes. And I didn't like what I saw. Publication is funny like that. Not funny like Richard Pryor. You know what I mean.
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I miss Sabrina Orah Mark. We used to be friends.
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Justice!
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I'm behind on my email. Sorry! I'll get back to you soon, GC. OMG. I just named dropped! Yeah, I know G.C. Waldrep. He emails me. I roll like that.
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Whom? Who? ???? I still have trouble using these words correctly.
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The Latino/a Writers Issue of the Indiana Review is out. Someone emailed me and asked why I wasn't in the issue. Why? BECAUSE THEY REJECTED MY SUBMISSION. Why do people ask stupid questions! Granted, I sent them poems with typos. Bad, bad, bad. I know. And to top it off I sent an email a week later with "revised" poems. What was I thinking? I know better than that. I can't complain, though. IR has published me twice before. They've been nice to me. Uptil now. It would've been nice to be in this issue: Jimmy Santiago Baca, Rafael Campo, Judith Ortiz Cofer, Angie Cruz, Diana Marie Delgado, Martin Espada, Suzanne Frischkorn, Richard Garcia, Kevin A. Gonzalez, Ray Gonzalez, David Hernandez, Roland Hinojosa-Smith, James Kimbrell, Joe Boo Ledoux, Alex Lemon, Sherly Luna, Sheila Maldonado, Manuel Luis Martinez, Pablo Medina,, Ricardo Pau-Llosa, Emmy Perez.

Wow. What a line up! I respect and admire so many of these names. Others I hate. Hate. Hate. Hate. I can't believe I'm not going to be published along side "Joe Boo Ledoux." Get it! Joe Boo! Baby, I'm digging the name. Any relation to Boo Radley? Was that racial? Oops. WTF? James Kimbrell is Latino? Really? How?? Did he once eat at a Mexican joint? Is his maid Cuban? I'm sorry but I'm going to need proof, James.

Sigh. I do wish I was included in this issue. Do you hear me! I want to be included! Am I not Latino enough for the poetry editors of Indiana Review? How dare they! I once was mistaken for Ricky Ricardo! I'm that Latino! And Chicano! And...

What will happen to the poems I sent to them? Oh, yeah. Post Road took them. Was that catty? I'm not saying Post Road is a better journal than Indiana Review. Everybody else is saying that. Was that catty? Granted, I sent Post Road typo-free poems. That might have made a difference. And look: G.C. Waldrep has a poem in the latest issue of Post Road. The new Virgil Suarez strikes again! Sorry, CG. LOL. Don't stop emailing me.
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La la la la...
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Paula: I miss your smile!
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I'm drinking a coke. With a straw. A pink, fleshy straw.
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I wish Robert Hass would send me an email. Or Rita Dove. Or Cyndi Lauper. Or Miles O'Brien. Not the Miles O'Brien from Star Trek: TNG. He's not real. I'm talking about the CNN anchor. He's hot.
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How many typos can you spot in this post?

6 comments:

John Gallaher said...

Hah!

OK, so 'bout the photo: I confess that, number one, I added a tone effect to get that overdeveloped look, which is a very forgiving look . . . and number two, you'll notice that the shot cuts off right where my hairline would be, if I still had an identifyable hairline.

By the way number one, Lorca was one of my first loves, along with Charles Wright (poets I found all by myself, browsing the library).

By the way number two, I still like "The Blindfold," and I promise not to say a word to Rita Dove. We'll keep it just between us, two winks and a nod.

C. Dale said...

Oh Edwina! You kill me. This post just kills me. And GC as Virgil Suarez had me in stitches. Too funny.

Sheryl said...

They rejected my poems too.

32poems said...

Holy crap. You are too funny.
xxoxo,
deb

Lorna Dee Cervantes said...

Don't feel bad. They rejected me, too. Granted, I stubbornly sent all these "critical reconstruction" poems. Dang! I never get to play pomo. If it doesn't have my grandma in it, they don't want it.

Good magazine. I'm sure it's a great issue. :-(

There was supposed to be an interview with me, but I guess they didn't use that either.

Thanks much for posting my piece.

Peace. I'm outa here. Gotta a hot cross-country date! (Good way to flush and purge the Poetry Foundation.)

Charles said...

Ooh, he is hot!